Thursday, October 14, 2010

Look at me, remembering to post!

You'd hope that remembering to post would also mean that I have a fabulous idea for a well thought out post. One with, like, photos and diagrams and links and stuff.

Alas.

Here's the thing. One of my children has developed a shrewd hatred for my computer. He sees me on it and starts screaming. Or he does something more insidious.

See there? Well you can't, but I had to take a five minute break because when he saw me on the computer he grabbed my computer bag and ran off with it. He then began ripping and tearing out the first 100 pages of my line edited manuscript. So when I jumped up to save the manuscript and put the bag up where he can't reach it, he ran around me, climbed on a chair at the kitchen table and shut my laptop. Just as he was about to toss it off the table, I caught him.

Dude.

My other children, when they were two, also hated my computer, but they were not this... intense. I mean, he has this bait and switch act down perfectly.

And so, when I sit down to write a post, or work on my book, or check my email, he freaks out and develops these Rube Goldbergian ways to lure me away from my cherished macbook so that he can destroy it.

I understand that he's jealous of the time I spend on my computer. And believe me, if I was able to figure out some kind of harness wherein I could wear my laptop around my neck like a cigarette-girl tray, I would type on the run. He could chase me and yell and I could tappity-tappity tap as I round the corners in the house at 80 mph.

This is not a cigarette girl, this is a dude with a bagel.
He showed up when I did a google image search for "cigarette girl tray".


So this is my long ass excuse for not having a proper post for you guys today. I will tell you, though, that I should have something AWESOME for you next week. This weekend I'm headed out to the Texas Book festival where I will be seeing folks like Laurie Halse Anderson, David Wiesner, Scott Westerfeld, Lisa Railsback, Sara Pennypacker, Carolyn Cohagan, Meg Cabot, Heather Brewer, Kirsten Miller, Andrea Cremer, Justin Larbastelieralsterraila, Holly Black, Kami Garcia, Justin Cronin, M.T. Anderson, Varian Johnson, April Lurie, Cynthia Leitich Smith, Brian Yansky, Ingrid Law, Chris Barton, Heloise, AND my kids will get the chance to learn magic, create a luchador, write a book and have an adventure with the Cat in the Hat. AND, I will go to the Unicorns vs. Zombies panel and sit squarely on the zombie side. AND I might have the chance to drive some of the aforementioned authors around in my car (and now that I know how to work the doors on my minivan, I won't lock them out like I did to Ally Carter last year).

This is going to be a weekend of Adventure and Awesome and Books and Authors. I might have to shoot my youngest kid with a tranquilizer dart so that I can go, but I know it will all work out.

Just kidding about the tranquilizer dart.

Don't you wish you lived in Austin? I do. Because then you could babysit.

2 comments:

E. Kristin Anderson said...

Can't wait to see the Zombies/Unicorns panel with you! We can totally heckle, er, cheer all our local celebrities up there.

Also, looking forward to seeing you & the little guy tomorrow. I want baby hugs! And, um, you're cool too.

Teh Awe-Some Sauce said...

I love this post. My kiddo has the same deep and abiding hate for my computer. Everytime she sees it in my hands she looks at me and says "Put the computer down" like she's on Cops and I'm a guy wearing a tank top.

And I do wish I lived in Austin, but only so we could go in halfsies on a babysitter and go to the book festival together :)

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